Bloging cuz i got nothing better to do

Ok i lied im blogging cuz i got no one to talk to... And it seems more more ever day i got less people i can talk to. I mean for last few weeks ive been working door at edwards witch is ok on busy days were i dont need to be running around every where... But man ! is it lonely... Yeah im lame. And another thing for some reason ive been being put to work with all the lazy people so im always on the regester all night while they laugh it up in the back while making boxes. God i hate them. I miss the people i worked with at kohls there was always someone to talk to there.... But i dont miss that place for a second. I just need someone to F ing talk to. I can not wait to go to Ax ill be with Tson yen becky and tony for a good week YAY ^ ^. But it doesnt look like my Dee will be able to go this year... To many bills i guess. Witch is the same for me to... I should really stop complaining and just find another job to keep me busy. I mean gawd i hate being at home with nothing to do no one to talk to. Games are even more boring... I like card games alot better. Alest there is some interaction with someone else. Or maybe i am just always in the wrong place in the wrong time. Maybe i just need to get into a club or something meet some new people cuz man has everyone grown apart... Or at lest me from them i think. Its nice seening them but there have been moments where i have been at work and i think to myself meh i missed a game of basket ball no big. Man i am a hypercrite... Sigh i think i am done ranting over nothing night everyone...

Yet another blog

Life...

Life is something intresting isnt ? The past year has been pretty intresting to say the lest. And even now it seems to change every secound is so fast and at times so hard to watch pass by. Work has changed so much... We arent aloud to talk to anyone any more... Its so lame doing the truck now. Me and Dee are well... Its hard to say it done. I think i have really had it with waitting for her to make up her mind. Sigh each day is really lonely now even with this new girl i am talking to. Maybe it is to soon to be talking to anyone for that matter... But i cant fight the lonelieness and ive lost alot of intrest in games sept when i play teken with tson tony and mike. Table has been pretty good to me free 60 bucks all most just from playing slots.

Ive stopped talking to erick all together right now it seems for the best... Ive been seeing more and more of my old friends lately. And i see now how much we have grown apart. Really sad we all used to be so close i thought. Now it seems ive become so close with other people that i have lost my conection with old friends. How i miss thoughs days of yugioh and basketball. Now it seems like such a hasle to get everyone together that i dont even feel like bothering... God i miss how things used to be... I some times look up and ask what am i what are we all missing in life now ? Have we all really lost time for ourselfs and one another... Or do we really just not care anymore. Right now I have been working on building myself up getting ready for what might be my life in the near future. And as hard as it looks its what has to be done ? I mean i cant very well live my life with tson and yen for ever... Can i ? Ive said it once and ill say it agian I feel like that dad in american beauty... Old and Invisable XD. It is only the out right crazy things i do that make and keep me sain and from slapping people that miss treat me in the face... Gawd i wanna scream some times and people to wake up and be happy for me.... So i can stop being so depressed. I Wanna take the world and keep it from dieing. I want a frige full of rootbeer floats and me and eds pizza perroni extra crispy. I wanna stop everything that makes people lieing to them selfs... I want to Just be happy.

Man that felt good to say.... Ok emo stage done. My song is playing right now and it makes me feel like i can do anything so yeah im good now ^ ^. So yeah i am single agian YAY ? I want some one who can make me laugh. I want some one i can spoil not to spoil me !!! I dont mind doing all the work... some times lol... Please dont be normal please be something no one else can be. Be JUST BE. If you like anime fuck yeah if not fuck yeah. But for god sakes be honest. Cant stand people i cant fucking talk to. another thing be ok with me being a loser lol and wierd. I mean come on. So i like to play DDR and so what i like to dance like a Baka i dont know how to spell ideot lol... brain fart right their... Please be ok with yourself before you try to step up to this. Cus i might hate life. But nothing is better than living my life damn it !!! So know how to live yours before you come and try and live in mine.

Ok im done with my rant cant think of anything else to say sept i cant wait to quit kohls and its gheto ass. Cant wait to see tiffany this summer cant wait to go to school cant wait to keep doing what i do...

Being me.

Another update.

So... Today and yesterday lets talk about them. Yesterday was a really good day in work as i got alot of credit cards sold... Someone yelled at me but fuck them wasnt my fault no one works there. That night wasnt the best. I talked to Dee.... And that isnt bad or anything just the way it all ended... Wasnt how i wanted it. We started talking about our break up all over agian... I got really emoshanal and said alot of things i really wished i hadnt of said... And though a part of me wishes i could take it all back... It is what was in my heart.

Today I went to open a new account with wells fargo. I got a credit card of 700 bucks O.o. A free checking acount and a pony XD ? I Also went to get my fasffa done but the place i went to work on it said i would need to talk to the people in Fresno city for the new fasffa forms ? So ill need to make a trip over there some time later and get my as going. As for my major i think i just came up with what i wanna do I wanna go in to writting. Id love to make a book maybe some day a anime or a vidoe game storyline. Its all my dreams in one almost. One id love to have something of mine to leave behind. Two something i could put my all into. Three I love anime games and good stories i get lost in. And i think wanna learn to make all that and share it with the world some day. And maybe even one day be opra rich XD. I also watched the girl who lept through time for the first time. And man was that a funny and captivating story. Also tought yen how to play maple story lol...

Updates for other people out there.

Mikey. Fucking pick up your phone and call us ? Lets plane to do something soon.

Bryan is gay !!!

Hung sorry i dont have money to do shit anymore...

Erick Hope to go to together as one with you man.

Tson We will figure it out some how ? And still manage to have fun along the way

Yen GO TO SCHOOL PLOX !!!

Chloe Sorry i dont go on msn at all i might be getting my own computer soon. So yay !?!? Anyways give me a call so we can catch up with everything ! I quit maple along time ago ^ ^ Maple card games for the win ^ ^

To Robert aka me ? Dont give up sleep less do more keep up the good work.

To Dee

Even now i dont know what to say or do... I can only wish with time you can forgive me... I hate the way everything has had to turn out between us. Please dont give up on yourself you got a long way to go still and i hope to see you at the end of it all. Keep praying for me cuz i need so much help... And i dont know how to finish ether. Just take care of yourself.

Venting Like Always

So yeah today has just been one of thoughs days where you look around and think to yourself "am i the only one that isnt stupied here "? Ok So lets begin... Today I got up and out of bed around 8 30 Cought the bus and headed to work was perty nomal day... Sept it was ungodly foggy... Like silent hill foggy...  So i get to work and ive just used my last dollar for the bus do to the fact that rent is do today and i owe 300 bucks... Witch isnt so bad seeing as how I had one last ace on hold for a rainny day... Or so i thought. Witch ill get to later. Anyways Work starts. Perty normal day flirt around here and there with the girls fold some clothes that kind of stuff. Now this is kohls i dont know if you have ever been in side one of these places in the morning but besides the customers there is 1 peson at each ends of the store with one regester. One manager that doesnt do shit unless i call them to get off their ass. And one matinence guy... So after 30 minuntes of working me and the other regesters get hit with a never ending amount of customers... Ive said this once before. But do fucking people that are shopping just all meet up in the middle and say " HEY !!! Are you all done shopping ? FUCK YEAH ME TO ! LETS ALL GO TOGETHER !!! Fuck The fact that there is only one person at the regester with 5 people already waitting lets all go and give these people a hard time..." So yeah I am sitting there with all these peolple who are just staring me down like i am suppost to magicly make 5 other people come out of no where and help them... People man... I mean cant you hear me calling for back up ? I nomarly have my walkie full blast cant you hear the manager tell me and the other assosiate there is no back up ? LOL Right ..? Grow some fucking ears please ?

So i beat the rush i let everyone have there discounts i didnt even check anything... How could i ? Im perty sure the company kohls lost a good 100 bucks today cus they didnt have anyone to help me out... But oh well All i got to say to that is "Yes we can !!! Have a G.R.E.A.T. Day...  Work ends tosn relieves me and i go to with draw the last of my money for rent... Just make it with 3 dollars left in one bank. I Think to myself ill need money for the bus or i am not going to make it to friday... So i get my things and walk at lest a mile to Golden 1 And go into my savings i had had there of 20 bucks for i dont know the longest time... I walk in 20 mins before closing.... I give her my info and think to myself looks like i am going to make it... Till i hear these words... Um

Now working in retail has taught me alot of things and um means some one fucked up... The teller looks at me and says. You have 20 dollars in the acount but it is on hold ? Ok WTF Does that mean and why is it on hold ? So she calls a manager he doesnt know... She calls collections... And they tell me i owed them 19 bucks from like a year ago... Now Here is the thing. A year ago i over drafted like 20 bucks and never paid it till i got my job at kohls. I Always seem to remember the most random things but i remember that whole transaction word for word... I walked in the the letter i recieved from collections saying i owed them how ever much and PAYED IT OFF. Now do to the fact that i took forever to pay it they closed my checking acount. After asking if i could reopen my checking account the man replayed that i would have to reapply for it. BUT That i could deposite 20 dollars to keep my savings open and that they would send me a new debit card. I agreed and deposited the money... BEFORE LEAVING I Asked is that all ? I dont owe any more right ? The man said Yes thats all i will get the card in the mail, I then left.

So back to what this girl is tell me. She says that there was aperantly "another" Fee for keeping my savings after the fact that i had already paid my debit off... And i thought how the hell is that ? If i paid you off i dont owe you more... You dont send me bills for an amount and when its payed off ask for more... So I argued with this girl for like 20 minutes out side of Golden 1 And let me say this she wasnt the smartest person in the world. And another thing retail and well life has tought me. Is if you dont scratch my back im not scratching yours... So since the whole time i was making the girl feel she was thinking fuck this guy and his 20 bucks i wanna go home on time... It got the point where i told her to let me talk to her supperviser cuz i wasnt going to have it... The supperviser Named peter... After along dispute told me he would have to look more into it... And that he would call me back. He never did... So i am broke off my ass Pissed off with a vengence like no other and fustrated beyond all the bounds... I am going to call Peter tomarrow and he had better have a good reson what ever it is as to why i cant have my money if not i am going to just blow up....

Good night everyone i am off to try and relax.... Maybe get something to drink or watch some good old porno lol.... PEACE !!!